


Cooking is Love Made Visible

by QueenKatniss



Category: Bellarke - Fandom, The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Jealous Clarke, Mutual Pining, Not Actually Unrequited Love, cooking bellamy, soft bellarke, unbetaed so bear with me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-12 18:34:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16000946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenKatniss/pseuds/QueenKatniss
Summary: Bellamy and Clarke are best friends who cook together. Bellamy is dating Gina and Clarke is (trying to be) happy for him, while being hopelessly in love with him.Gina and Echo are only mentioned, so I didn't include them in the characters tags.





	Cooking is Love Made Visible

“You could help, you know,” Bellamy teased as he slid the pan of enchiladas into the oven. 

“Nah-uh, a deal’s a deal, Blake. You make dinner, I make dessert.” Clarke perched atop the tiny island in Bellamy’s apartment, stuffing her mouth with shredded cheddar cheese straight from the bag. He moved around her as if she were an appliance, an immovable object in his kitchen, instead of asking her to move. He rolled his eyes at her excuse for being no help with dinner, but it wasn’t without softness. 

She was a stickler for technicality, but usually only when it benefitted her. Like right now, she didn’t have to help him with his half of the night’s chore, but she’d fully expect him to help shave the chocolate and make sure the milk didn’t come to a boil when it was time to prep for dessert. To be fair, she’d start off telling him “rules are rules” and do it alone, but she’d cave when he’d insist that lending a hand was no problem. 

And, for Bellamy, being with Clarke was never a problem.

She was a staple in his kitchen. After they’d spent junior year discovering they could recreate almost every recipe they loved for much cheaper at home, cooking together had become a weekly routine. They both had their strengths. 

Bellamy cooked the meals because he was better at figuring out what a recipe needed. He could tell by smell or taste if it needed more salt, more cheese, less butter, needed to cook longer, et cetera. 

Clarke  was better at desserts. Ninety-nine percent of the time she baked. Cookies, brownies, pies, pastries, they were all fair game in the Blake household. Baking was fun for Clarke because she could follow an exact recipe. It was science. It was predictable. After a few trials and errors in the beginning (who knew every oven had its own temperament?) she found comfort in the simplicity of combining flour, sugar, eggs and making something sweet and comforting. Sharing it with Bellamy afterward was all part of what made it so special. 

Tonight she was thinking of making hot chocolate. Clarke knew it was a favorite of his, and she wanted to help bring a little levity to his state of mind. Although he hadn’t said it outright, she knew that something was bothering him. His shoulders had been a little more tense, his eyes a little dimmer, his laughs not coming as often. While he always came to her with everything, she thought tonight he may need a little coaxing. Their relationship was honest and open, and she cherished it beyond all else. Being Bellamy’s best friend was the easiest and best decision she’d ever made. Making sure he was okay and offering him any help she could was the least she could do. He’d made her life so complete simply by being hers. 

He moved around his kitchen with practiced grace, his large frame taking up most of the space. He cleaned up the mess he’d made cutting peppers, sitting the knife and cutting board in the left side of the tiny double sink. After throwing the bones away from the rotisserie chicken and resealing all of the containers and putting everything back in its place, he wiped his hands on a dish towel and turned to face Clarke. His eyes were downcast and focused on the cloth in his hands, his socked feet crossed at the ankles. A maroon t shirt stretched across his chest and shoulders, gray faded jeans sat at his hips secured with a dark brown belt. 

Clarke felt a pull to slide off the counter and cross to him, wrap her arms around his middle and squeeze him tightly. But she sat where she was. It wasn’t that she worried he wouldn’t return the embrace because she knew doubtlessly that he would. He’d wrap her in his arms and bury his face in her neck, lifting her slightly off the floor. She knew she’d feel his breath fan across her ear and slide across her collar bone. The smell of his shampoo and the earthiness of his skin would overtake all her senses. She knew she’d have to fight her urge to press her body fully against him, fight the sigh of content that could easily morphe itself into a breathy moan if she wasn’t oh - so - careful. 

Instead she cleared her throat and made herself busy with zipping the bag of cheese before she ate anymore of it. 

“Do you want to talk about it yet?” she asked softly. 

Bellamy didn’t play dumb with her. He knew she’d know something was off. But he wasn’t positive he could speak about everything in his head just yet. And he knew he couldn’t with her. So he just lifted his shoulder and let it drop, and glanced up at her from below his dark curls. “I don’t really know if I can put everything into words just yet, y’know, how I’m feeling about it all.”

Clarke nodded, trying not to take it personal. She knew he’d come to her with it eventually. 

“So,” she offered, “I’ll help you wash the prep dishes? Or set the table?”

His answering smile was soft and shy. 

 

Even though it was only the two of them, Clarke still liked to set the table for dinner. The small space only sat four people, so it only took a couple seconds to lay out paper napkins, forks and knives, and a couple of sodas. It was one of the few fancier aspects of life she still carried with her, despite having left most of that behind when she’d moved 600 miles for college. The fact that she only insisted on setting it when it was just her and Bellamy having dinner together never occurred to her. 

After she finished with that, she joined him at the sink to rinse the few items he’d used to prep dinner. Their conversation had resumed easily.. She was still in her first year of teaching and her adventures with sixth grade art students never ceased to make him laugh. 

She held the long glass cutting board beneath the stream of water as they both chuckled 

“She’s going to be a handful, I can already tell,” Clarke groaned.

“What’s her name? Madi?” Bellamy asked. 

“Yeah,” she smiled. 

Bellamy passed her the knife, handle first, as he spoke again a minute or so later. 

“I broke up with Gina this morning.”

The knife clattered to the bottom of the sink, the clanging a sharp contrast to the relative quiet of their voices and the apartment.

“Jesus, Clarke.”

“I’m sorry!” she stammered. “It was slippery!” She managed to swipe the knife out of the sink and lift it to rinse beneath the faucet. Her heart hammered and she could feel her cheeks redden, both with embarrassment and result of her blood pumping wildly.  _ He broke up with Gina??  _ Her mind was squealing with forty different questions she wanted to burst with, but that was the first and foremost. She managed to turn her head and meet his eyes.

His expression was slightly timid and closed off, and she couldn’t make heads or tails from it. 

“Why? I thought you liked her,” was all she managed to say. She tamped down on any hint of hope inside herself that the reason was her. Clarke knew that wasn’t it. 

“I do like her. She’s a sweetheart, and she’s gorgeous, and she doesn’t put up with any of my shit.” He grinned somewhat sadly. 

Clarke smiled back at him, shifting to turn off the water and grab the hand towel to dry the knife. “Okay, so what’s the problem?” 

Bellamy paused, and his eyes shifted to watch her hands as she wiped the blade. The softness faded from his eyes. 

“Echo text me yesterday.”

Clarke froze. The warmth she felt from wanting to comfort Bellamy dissipated in an instant. Behind that came a quick and icy stab of jealousy. Echo. 

The girl Bellamy had dated over a year ago. She’d been introduced to their circle of friends through him, and while it took everyone a bit to warm to her, she’d eventually become a part of the group. The only two people who had never taken a liking to her were Clarke and Octavia, Bellamy’s sister. Both girls had felt like she couldn’t be trusted, despite everyone else’s claims that she could be. Sure enough, one by one, Echo betrayed each of them in some way. Bellamy had held onto his relationship with her for far too long, out of some twisted sense of loyalty, while everyone else had long started keeping her at arm’s length. 

One day he’d ccme into the bar, Dropship, with a more carefree attitude than he’d had in months. After a few drinks he admitted he’d broken up with Echo. Clarke and Octavia had breathed a sigh of relief, sharing a look across the bar, while everyone else offered him condolences. 

And that had been the last he’d spoken of her in over a year. 

Clarke was surprised how calm her voice sounded when she spoke. “And?”

Bellamy’s eyes swept up to her face again but she wasn’t looking at him. Her voice had been cool, and he’d expected no less. She hadn’t exactly hid how she’d felt about Echo when he’d dated her, and didn’t bother to pretend to be sorry when he’d ended it, either. 

He kept his eyes on her face while he spoke. “She was just checking up on me. Wanted to get together and catch up, offered to get lunch today.”

Clarke only nodded. She used one hand to pry the knife out of the other before she sliced open her own palm in her stiff grip. Her whole body felt rigid, as if she’d been standing in one position for hours instead of minutes. She realized then that every muscle she owned was clenched, and made an effort to release some of the tension from her stance.

“Oh,” she took a breath, “so you broke up with Gina because you thought there was a possibility of getting back together with Echo?” 

She barely registered Bellamy’s stiff posture at her words. “No, of course not. Do you think so low of me? That I’d dump a great girl like Gina for the off-chance of a relationship with someone else?”

His words stung, though she knew they weren’t about her. She knew he’d never act in such a way, and it had been low to suggest he would. But the thought that he hadn’t broken up with Gina for a possibility of a relationship with  _ her, _ either, still hurt. 

He spoke again before she had a chance to respond. “Much less someone like Echo, who was the other half of the most toxic relationship I’ve ever had.”

That stopped Clarke short, and her gaze snapped to his. 

“Wait, what? If you don’t want to be with Echo then why did you break up with Gina because of a lunch date?” 

Bellamy sighed heavily and ran a hand down his face. “Clarke, you ridiculous little cricket, if you’d stop jumping to conclusions for one minute I’d tell you.”

“A cricket,” she deadpanned. 

“Well, you’re hopping to conclusions aren’t you?” he exclaimed, a smile already forming.

“Oh my God, you complete dork. Do you run a children’s television show when I’m not around?” But her face was cracking, she couldn’t help it.

He rolled his eyes to the ceiling and sighed again before continuing. 

“I didn’t have lunch with Echo, and my reason for breaking up with Gina had very little to do with Echo herself.” He watched as her smile waned, and she tilted her head slightly to the side. She was so adorable like this. The need to reach out and settle a hand at her waist was powerful, but he gripped her shoulder lightly instead. She stepped minutely closer to him. 

Clarke let herself relax a little more. He hadn’t broken up with Gina  _ for  _  Echo, and he didn’t have lunch with her today, either. Concern filled her blue eyes. “So, what happened, then?”

“I-” 

_ Beep. Beep. Beep.  _

The timer alerted them that dinner was done. Bellamy turned and grabbed a mitt before bending to retrieve the enchiladas, and Clarke let herself get a fantastic eyeful of his excellent ass in those jeans. He set the tray on the stovetop and turned back to her. She ripped her eyes from his lower half to meet his gaze. Unsurprisingly, she found him smirking. 

He took two strides to cross the kitchen and stopped in front of her, she reached behind her to grasp the edge of the island to steady herself. Being in his presence was always a heady experience and she needed to be able to listen to what he was saying. 

“Echo text me yesterday to check in, see how things were going. Truthfully, I think she was half expecting a hookup, but when I mentioned I was with Gina she realized that wasn’t going to happen.”

Clarke only nodded.

“She got a little sour after that, and started spouting off some stuff I thought was ridiculous but she was very adamant about. I pretty much told her thanks but no thanks on the lunch date, and that was that. Gina came over shortly after. I complained to her about what had happened and she asked to see the messages. When I showed her, she got very quiet. After some prying I got her to tell me that, basically, she agreed with Echo.”

Clarke’s face only read confusion and Bellamy acknowledged ti. “Exactly, that was my exact reaction, too. It really pissed me off. We got in a fight and I asked her to leave.”

He paused at this point in his story and it prompted Clarke to ask, “What did Echo say? What could she  _ possibly _ agree on with her?”

Bellamy met her eyes, level and sure. “That I’m in love with you.” 

Stunned, Clarke rocked backward, eyes like saucers. Her heart leapt twice in her chest before dropping out of her stomach beneath her. Hope took flight in her soul. Her eyes filled and she blinked several times to tamp out the wetness as she lowered them to the floor. She couldn’t do this, she reminded herself.  _ They _ think he’s in love with me,  _ he _ didn’t say he was. The thought sobered her a bit while her heart still fought like a bird to get out of its cage. 

He spoke her name and she didn’t answer, so he said it again. 

“Clarke.”

She fought to give herself a neutral expression before looking back up at him. His eyes shone so bright, two beautiful dark irises she could get lost inside. His expression was soft, his hands still sat firmly on her shoulders, and the only clue that he was less than perfectly calm was his the rise and fall of his chest, heaving at a slightly quicker rate than usual.  _ Is he nervous?  _ she thought warily. Nothing was making sense. 

“Clarke, I-” he began, “I broke up with Gina this morning. I had to.”

Clarke kept her eyes on his as she nodded, wanting him to say everything out loud. So she could understand, and so she could deal with whatever aftermath came next.

Bellamy sensed this and carried on. 

“I was so angry with both of them last night. How could they think that? I told Gina she was crazy. If I was with her, I couldn’t be in love with you. She made me happy. So, after I calmed down, I called her. I asked her what could make her think this. And, Clarke, she laid it all out. The dinner dates, the movie nights, the weekly grocery shopping together, we go to each other for everything -”

“We’re best friends, though. Best friends do all of that.”

“Which is what I told her. And she said that’s all true, except I make zero exceptions when it comes to her, or anyone else, even Octavia. That  _ you _ are my number one priority, over all other friends, girlfriends, family, work, anything. And, Jesus, Clarke, she’s right.”

“So maybe we’re a little codependent, but none of that is proof that you’re in love with me, Bell.”

He stopped. “You’re right. None of that is concrete, although its damning evidence. All I know is that after everything she said, it felt like everything clicked for me. I can’t deny what’s been spread out in front of me anymore.”

Clarke wanted to both laugh and cry, but she didn’t know which to do first. She took a breath and reached up to take Bellamy’s hands off her shoulders and hold them in hers. “Bellamy -”

“Echo asked me yesterday if you and I were dating yet. I told her she was being ridiculous and she said, ‘Oh, so you still haven’t figured it out yet.’ After Gina read the text she said she’d been hoping it had all been in her head, that she’d been reading too much into our relationship. She said Echo had confirmed her fears that what was between us wasn’t a fluke, and she wasn’t the only one who could see it.’

Clarke squeezed his hands tightly, hopeful tears springing to her eyes again. But she couldn’t let him do this to himself.

“Bellamy, Bellamy, please. You’ve got such a big heart. Please, please don’t feel like you owe me something because they’ve made you believe you love me. I can’t watch you do this to yourself. I love you so much and I don’t want you to feel like you  _ have  _ to be with me out of obligation because they’ve made you feel like this.”

His smile grew broad but she didn’t see it, still focused on their joined hands. 

He slipped a hand from hers to tip her chin upward, his thumb coming to rest directly below her full bottom lip. 

“They didn’t make me feel this way, they just made me see it. Finally.” 

Clarke’s eyes shimmered with tears and her hands flew up to grip the back of his neck. Hope rocketed through her, there was no stopping it this time. “Bell,” she whispered as her gaze flitted from his eyes to his mouth and back again, “tell me.”

Both his large hands grasped at her waist. His face softened and sobered, and his voice came out a gruff whisper. His breath fanned across her face as he spoke. 

“I’m in love with you, Clarke. I am in love with you, and I want you.” 

Clarke’s tears spilled down her cheeks as she surged up to her tiptoes, dragging him down to meet her while Bellamy hauled her forward and up by the waist, and captured her mouth. 

A tiny whimper escaped her when she finally felt his lips on hers. They were warm and solid, somehow soft and firm at once. His mouth moved against hers perfectly, a slide of lips and pressure against hers had her hands fisting in his curls. Her body pushed itself, of its own accord, against him, fitting into him easily. Bellamy groaned and changed the angle of the kiss, sucking her bottom lip into his mouth. She gasped lightly and he took that as permission to push her against the island. 

Clarke let out another moan and slotted herself between his legs, pressing hard against him. She dragged him down further and opened her mouth to him. His tongue sought and grazed lightly against hers. Bellamy growled deep and low into her mouth, and lifted her to the countertop. Clarke spread her thighs and welcomed him between them before wrapping her calves around his legs, pulling him flush against her. 

Her hands slid from his hair down his neck to his chest where they fisted in his t shirt. The heat coming off him in waves threatened to drown her. He tasted amazing, intoxicating her so sweetly she felt lightheaded. What she felt for him was so heavy and yet made her feel so light. This was  _ Bellamy, her Bellamy _ , and he was kissing her breathless. She needed him to know everything he felt was all reflected in her. 

She pushed against his chest and he backed off immediately. “Did I do-” he started.

“No,” she gasped and caught her breath, laughing lightly. “No, no, baby, you didn’t.”

His face softened at her endearment for him and he kept his hands at her waist. 

“I just- You know I love you, too right? You have to know that I want you. So much, Bellamy.”

Her ice blue eyes locked onto his, willing him to know everything she said was earnest. She wanted to leave no more room for guess work, and he needed to hear it all from her, just the way she was hearing it from him. 

“I was so jealous of Echo and Gina. That’s crappy of me but it’s true. I don’t know how long I’ve been in love with you, but it's been long enough to know that they were right. At least on my end. I’ve wanted you more than just as a best friend for a while. But more than that I just wanted you happy.” Silent, joyful tears still tracked down both her cheeks as she gazed up at him. 

The countertop brought her almost to his height but she still had to tilt her head back to meet his eyes. He beamed brightly and his eyes shone with unshed tears of their own as he lifted a hand to tuck a wavy blonde tendril behind her ear. Clarke shivered with the warmth it brought her and shifted minutely closer to him. 

“Clarke, I wanted to be happy with them. I almost was a couple of times. The reason I came so close was because I stopped telling myself how much I love you a long time ago. I decided it didn’t matter, because you didn’t see me that way, and I decided being your best friend was enough. I made myself believe it. I had to. And it was for a long time. 

And all those little thoughts that would pop up without my permission - like how soft you look when you wake up, or wondering what it would feel like to kiss you when you walk through the door, or what kind of mural you’d paint on our wall if we shared a bedroom - well, I got incredibly good at pushing them away.”

Clarke let out a giggle and touched her forehead to his. “You’re such a romantic. It’s the cutest thing. I know what you mean, though. Just before, when you were cooking dinner, I had to stop myself from hugging you.”

He quirked a dark brow. “Why would you ever stop yourself from hugging me?”

She smiled and felt a light blush creep across her cheeks. “Okay it wasn’t necessarily just a hug I wanted.”

A wry smile bloomed on his mouth. “Oh?”

Clarke’s eyes rolled quickly “I just knew where - in my head - it would go. Here, step back.”

Bellamy did as he was told and she hopped off the counter to stand in front of him. “Okay, hug me back the way you would have 10 minutes ago.” She stepped into him and wrapped her arms around his waist. Like clockwork, he wrapped his arms tightly around her and just barely lifted her off the ground, and then buried his face in her hair. Her face sat perfectly between his shoulder and neck and she could smell every ounce of his delicious scent, just the way she knew she would.

Bellamy’s voice was quiet when he spoke, “What’s so wrong with this?”

Her response was muffled in his shirt but he understood, “Because I can smell you, and you’re so warm and make me feel so safe. And I can feel everywhere we touch like it’s on fire.” She was grateful her face was hidden because it was flaming red at her confession. “It makes me want to do this.”

Clarke moved into him more so that her body fit into him, she slipped up to her tiptoes and aligned herself with him, stomach to stomach and thighs to thighs, while her hands flattened on his back. She pulled him impossibly closer and let out a breathy moan while her eyes slipped closed. 

The response from Bellamy was instantaneous. He squeezed her tighter in his arms and tucked his head so that his lips rested on her neck, his hips shifted he breathed her in. Her moan elicited something like a groan from him and he pressed an open-mouthed kiss to her skin. Clarke tilted her head so he could get a better angle at her neck. Her breath heaved as he kissed her silkily; beneath her jaw, down her neck, across her collar bone. While one of his hands slipped into her hair the other slid down, down, until it grasped her bottom and squeezed. 

Clarke lifted her leg and wrapped it around Bellamy’s hip while he continued to knead her ass. He pulled her flush against him and she moaned loudly. She’d just begun to grind against him when he pulled away from her neck to claim her mouth again. 

HIs tongue met hers easily when she opened for him. She tasted like everything savory he’d ever enjoyed. Her breath was hot and sweet and her tongue was soft and silky. He needed every inch of her in his mouth, right then. The hand that rested in her hair swept down her neck to land on her chest. Her t shirt was pulled tight enough he could see the outline of a bra before his hand closed over her breast to give it a gentle squeeze. Clarke’s head fell back and she pushed her chest forward, an open invitation to take more. He was closing his other hand over her when a thought occurred to him and he pulled away, a dry smile across his face.

“Jesus, Clarke,” he laughed.

Her head shot up in alarm at his sudden stop and caught sight of his smile. “What?” she gasped, then she remembered what had started all of this. Her face broke into its own smile and she shook her head, her mussed hair swinging about. 

They erupted into a fit of giggles until their sides ached, holding onto each other for support. 

“Do you see what I mean?” Clarke gasped between chuckles. “Do you see now why I had to stop myself from hugging you earlier?” 

Bellamy still smiled when he answered, “What, you didn’t want that?”

She gave him a side eye. “Obviously, I did! I’ve wanted that … so long,” she breathed a sigh.

“Me too, Princess,” he said quietly. “So, what do you say? Do you want to be my girlfriend? Or do you wanna skip that and go straight to marriage? Because I’m fine with that, too.” He laughed.

Clarke’s heart rolled in her chest at his joke, surprised at how badly she wanted that so soon. But she knew it would be worth it to take some time. Just maybe not a long time, after all, she thinks they might be done wasting it. 

She slid a hand up his chest to twirl a curl around her finger. “How about we meet in the middle.”

He cocked an eyebrow at her but his eyes were happy. Happier than she’d ever seen them.

“We already do everything together, including cooking and shopping and eating and cleaning, so … “ she trailed off, nervous. 

Bellamy rested his hands at her hips and pulled her closer, smiling brightly with a softness in his eyes. “Clarke, do you wanna live with me? Start all of this together?”

Her answer was a blazing smile as she shot up to capture his mouth with hers again. He lifted and wrapped her legs around his waist as he kissed her back, walking out of the kitchen toward the bedroom. Clarke pulled away long enough to say, “Our dinner is getting cold.” 

Bellamy just rolled his eyes and said “Clarke, this very reason is why we have a microwave,” and he kissed her again. She giggled delightedly at the use of “we” before whispering into his ear how much she loved him. 

They didn’t quite make it to their bedroom. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys like this little ditty. Let me know if you want a part 2??


End file.
